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Separate accommodation from in laws

Q:

Salam
I moved to london after getting married to my husband and I live with my in law in the same house. My brother in law lives across the road and so does my sister in laws family . Ever since we got married I never had privacy as every weekend and sometimes even on weekdays my brother in law and sister in laws family come over with their kids and stay as long as they desire . They eat food with us when they come over.i feel like me and my husband dont have our independence and I dont have my privacy. I want to start a life with my husband where every day we can perform our duties towards each other and learn. I feel home sick all the time as my parents or no family member of mine is here where as my in laws are around me all the time. Every one has a separate house with their wives here and have healthy relationships with their in laws. I have started getting fed up of our relationship and sometimes I dont want anyone around me . Houses in london are small that it is not ideal to live in a joint family system. We cant even have intimate relationship with my husband . My parents in laws room is tight next to ours and we share one bathroom. My parents always provided me with privacy and separate bathroom and room. I think i have the right to have separate accommodation as I am getting depressed day by day . I dont feel like I am home I am always uncomfortable and thinking about divorce but I love my husband too. Please help me and tell me if it us all right to ask for a separate accommodation. My in laws have all their kids living almost with them. I think we need to move out too. I feel like an orphan here as no body even asks my if I am ok. My sister in law even has the keys to the house so she can come whenever and then her kids would come. They are all very nice but that doesn’t mean I dotn have right to privacy and independence. I dont have kids yet and I am already gone into depression .its been 3 years to our marriage still I dont feel comfortable. I have to do everything according to my parents in laws rules. I am confined to my room . Please answer me ! Even hazrat fatima (AS)had her own accommodation.

A:

Waalykum salam

Thank you for your Question and I’m sorry to hear about your mental stress. InshaAllah it All gets solved.

so, of-course, you are certainly entitled to ask for a comfortable life with your husband and that will include separate accommodation where the two of you can have your own space and privacy. Anything that gets in way of your marital life should be removed so that the main purpose of your life is achieved.

according to Islamic laws as well, a man is the provider of his family. This is known as ‘Nafaqah’. And it is obligatory upon him to provide for this. hHe needs to ensure that you are comfortable and at peace in his house.
I will suggest a good talk with your husband and explain your discomfort. I’m sure thi  mg s can get better.

hope this helps and your problem is resolved.

N.S.Jaffery