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Recently I have found out that I have son from a previous haram relationship with a non believer.


Recently I have found out that I have son from a previous haram relationship with a non believer ,
She has made contact with me after 30 years,
What are my duties towards him,and what rights does my present wife have,ie: is it grounds for divorce or separation ..
Or Advice please how to deal with this…
Thank you



Salamun Alaykum

Thank you for your query.

As you have already mentioned the relationship was Haram and that too with a non-believer. Are you sure he is your son and from your Haram relation?

We must be careful of our deeds. The son is born as illegitimate but you being as a father had a responsibility towards the maintenance.  Father must provide the maintenance of the child even if illegitimate but since you did not know about the child it is ok. But you must provide for his basic necessities if he needs. (Just for the child and not the mother).

The illegitimate child does not inherit anything from the father.

You must repent for what you have done and never repeat it again. Ask for the true forgiveness from Allah(swt) by performing a true Tawbah.

Some of the essentials and conditions for Tawbah are:

  1. To remorse over the past.
  2. The resolution not to return to it ever.
  3. To return to creatures their (formerly usurped) rights so that you meet God Almighty in a state of purity in which no one has any claim against you.
  4. That you fulfil every duty that you neglected in order to satisfy your obliga­tion in respect to it.


If you married your wife correctly according to the Islamic Shariah, then it is valid and you don’t have to divorce or separate. Having haram relationship in the past doesn’t mean that you divorce your wife which will be unjust to her. So you must continue your life and love your wife and fulfill the duties as a husband.

From our past experience, the question that usually comes up after this one is; if the husband should mention to his wife about his past relation? A simple answer to this will be, this was your past sin. It was something Allah knew about. Hence, you must repent over it and do no need to disclose or discuss about it to anyone.

May Allah(swt) grant you success


AAA team under the guidance of Syed Haider