The World Federation One Stop Fiqh

Ask an Alim

My mother is not well since 10 Years.


As salamu wai lai kum. My mother has been sick from 10+ yrs , its started with heart attack and for it she was hospitalized 4 times every year then kidney disease n a year back brain stroke for which she was hospitalized 3 months.. now she screams shouts vomits and is on bed 24/7 so all nature call is on bed only so I have to clean each time n it’s going on from more than a year .. I have no other way n I am only person earning so almost whole night I have to stay with her n day time i have to go to office, keep aside my physical struggles Its so hurting to see my mother vomiting n screaming due to pain .. I am making duwa as much as I can I won’t call it’s on vane but also I don’t see my condition improve rather worst… I knw tat Allah loves each individual so much which I get from Quran… I love my mother n my mother is also one whom allah loves .. he has the power to heal effortlessly than I don’t understand wats stopping.. I am trying with my duwa even my sister went n sat in front of kaaba n asked with all heart.. Pliz help me with some words from you as I am completely broken and I knw I can’t do suicide also as I would be landing into even bigger trouble.


Waalykum salam 

Thank you for your Question.
I’m in short of words for a brave and strong person like your noble self! May Allah increase your strength and bless you with the best in both the worlds.
I’m sorry to hear about your mother and hope she recovers. It is very difficult to see parents being ill and bed ridden.
As for your question, yes Allah has power over everything but that doesn’t mean that by clearing out someone’s medical issues HE  proves his power. Everyone has to leave the dunya, we are all lined up, one after the other, some have very strong and vivid reasons while some are taken by surprise. The whole idea that we all must be able to digest is to believe that this Dunya is not the final abode and there is more for our souls.
We don’t die die when we leave this world. Our soul just leave the body and goes to a better and freer place.
However this dunya has a great impact on our next level of life. The amount of good doings you have earned here, your struggles and difficulties all count there.
In your mother’s case, she has suffered so much and our hearts ache to hear about her, but on the hind side, her difficulty in this temporary station makes her permanent life better. It is kind of paying off for her to have a better Akhirah.  Since she has suffered so much already InshaAllah Allah helps her to have an easier next life.
The above is my words of understating, however Allah is the best planner, HE can surely fully restore someone’s health and vice versa. But whatever is decreed for one, it is to be for the best, as Allah is the BEST OF PLANNERS! All we can do is to pray for her and do our best to take care of her.
As for yourself, suicide is a cowards thought. And hearing about yourself and how brave you are to take care of your mother, doesn’t sit well. I suggest you take some counseling or speak to a local scholar for support and further guidance with motivation.
Also, as you mentioned, you have a sister, and she can be a helping hand while you catch up with a bit of rest and beak.
Yourself and your mother are in my prayers

Kind regards,

Naajiya Jaffery