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Mother is extreme pessimist


Assalamualaikum wa rahamatullahi wa barakatu

How are you?Hope you are doing fine.
I dont know how to explain or where to start.
My mother has started taking everything her family says in a wrong way.Everything every word is an attack to her.She connects what they had said few days or years back to what they say now.
No what they do ,she thinks its either a taunt or emotional verbal towards her.
Few years back they were fights within the family.Slowly we were all getting back together and then my dad died.
In between she was fine she didnt have problem with her family.Later she started taking evrything say or do as against her.Shes gone on to accuse them for causing dads death by using black magic.
According to her to cover up their mistakes they are doing this emotional torture.

I dont think its true. everyone is truly worried about her.
My uncles and aunt dont know how much my mom is angry with them.they knownthat sometimes she takes whatever they say as wrong.Which my aunt kept telling her shes misunderstanding.

No matter how much me and my ister explain her she wont change.
We think she still holding on to grief for my dads death and anger of previous fights.

What should i do to get all this brothers and sisters together.
I feel helpless seeing my mother like matter how much i explain her she goes back to take everything negatively not only with her family but evn strangers neighbours too sometimes.

Please advice me on what to do.


Waalykum salam

Thank you for your question and sorry to hear about your father’s demise and mother’s situation

as you said yourself, it looks like your mum has some underlying condition  to make her feel the way she is. Usually the underlying condition is depression or anxiety. Anyhow, since you are worrying about your mother being distant from her siblings, the best you Can do to bond them will be to explain your uncles and aunts about her situation. That way, instead of judging her or feel hurt by her words or action, they will try and empathize InshaAllah and You will have solved the problem that way.

on a side note, it will be good if you seek some help for your mother. You may want to speak to a therapist or a counselor and see what ways will be effective to start her off on an indirect process that will help her. Once she gets the indirect help from you and is more balanced you can then introduce her directly for further help InshaAllah .

in the mean time, make loads of duas, set a side some Charity and recite ziarat Ahsura for 40 days for her InshaAllah. InshaAllah she is relieved of this condition soon.

best wishes,