The World Federation One Stop Fiqh

Ask an Alim

Kafara for refusing a proposal.


Salamalaikum brother I was looking for a girl for my son some relatives sent me pictures of girl in pictures she looked very fair but wen they came to our house she was not as expected my son saw him on Internet video call and said he liked the girl I had asked my son in front of the girl and then fixed his marriage and given their relation in zamanath of Imam e zamana he used to talk to the girl and we too talked to her sometimes but my grand mother who loves my son said that she din like the girl after that I was in 2 minds and now my son is also in 2minds he wants to tell her that he cannot marry her as he feels that she is not compatible with her wen he used to talk she used to tell him I had a very bad anger and I shout on others and I like to irritate people and hide there things my son feels that he is not matured enough it’s since a month they were talking I am very worried as to what will the girl and her parents will go through as well as I am very afraid that I gave the relation in mou las zamanath I said my son to think again he is very confused and wants to end it I want to know how can I repent for my deed please advise I fear a lot to God and 14masoomeen but at the same time I think if he marries and if the marriage doesn’t work then it will be the worst condition I don’t want that to happen so said my son to talk to the girl for few days and take the decision please advise if we had to give kafaara as I am doing tau a every day


Wa alaykum salam

We are recommended to think very well before taking any step or making any decision in our lives
But sometimes despite of all precautions,we tend to make mistakes which make us regret later .
At this point,instead of making another mistake,the best thing is to rectify the mistake even if you have to bear its loss.
In your case,speak to your son and if you see he cannot live with the girl,its better to end the relationship now than later.
There is no kaffara for this but do a lot of istighfar for unintentionally causing problems for someone else.

Kind regards
Sukaina Taqawi.