The World Federation One Stop Fiqh
Search
Menu

Ask an Alim

Istikhara dream about divorcing my husband

Q:

Salam. I have made istikhara about my marriage for two days and stopped. I am not very happy currently in my life. I am married now for 6 months. We dont yet have children or pregnancy. My husband is practising Sayid muslim. He fullfills all his marital duties. But lately, about 1 month, I have not been feeling love towards him. I dont like to be intimate with him. I am just having intimacy with him because its my duty as his wife. But I dont enjoy it. I hate to kiss him and sleep with him. I would love to sleep in bed alone without him. This hate towards him started after we were fighting about month ago. During our fight I got panic attack and hyperventilated (couldnt breath). I told my husband but he didnt listen me. I told him I want to sit outside in front of our door just for few minutes to calm down and have some fresh air. He didnt let me. He carried me and forced me to our bedroom and pushed me to bed and then strangled me. So a month after that I made Istikhara about divorcing him since I really still havent got over that event. Soon after istikhara I got dream. In that dream I married someone else.I even got his name in dream. In real life I dont know anyone who has that name, neither does my husband. I was happy in that dream. I was so sad to wake up from it. Could this mean my istikhara answer is to divorce my husband?

A:

Waalaykum Salam.

Sorry to hear about your experience.

Marriage is a very holy knot. It is a knot that when broken shakes the throne of the Almighty.

My dear sister, a dream is after all just a dream! It’s like wanting to
live in an illusion than reality. You need to know that no dream
interpreter, if you find an authentic one that it, would recommend you to
break off your marriage for a dream. however in your situation because you
also went through physical abuse, I would suggest you look into the
following steps:

1) Istikhara is only taken when you have no way out. I.e. your thinking has ended up nowhere, counselling has come to a dead end etc etc..
In your case doing an istekhara for marriage after being already married is really under Question.

2) To solve your problem with your husband. Pls speak to a counselor to resolve your issues. Ask for advice and implement those in your life.

3) Apart from the above. Please try and build a communication bridge with him. You have a lifetime of togetherness. It’s better to sort our petty
things this early than when you have kids ,InshaAllah.

You’re in my special prayers.
Naajiya.S.Jaffery