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is it wrong to express love to my wife in the presence of my mum, sister and two small brothers?


Asalamualaikum, i have just been newly married alhamdulillah and my wife has moved into my house where my familly such as mother, father, sister and two small brothers live with me, We are a pakistani familly and my familly follow alot of their culture where it’s inappropriate to sit with your wife as its considered something ashaming. i like to joke with my wife, put my arms around her shoulders and sometimes lay my head on her lap to show her how much i love and appreciate her, i keep everything to a limit when familly is present but just recently my mother was really angry on what i do and told me that i need to have some shame, i wish to know whether the teachings of the prophet saw stops me from joking, expressing love and appreciation to my wife on how i said above



Wa Alaikum al-salam Hussein

thanks for your question

Congratulations for your marriage, prophet sawa  “When a man has married, he has completed one half of his religion.”

Our behavior toward people is different based on social traditions and culture of that society, for example in IRAN putting our back to so others while sitting considered disrespectful or in IRAQ stretching your leg toward someone is disrespectful etc. even if these tradition be wrong we have to do them in order to prevent social misunderstandings. On the other hand you have brothers and sister and your actions might make them fall into sins (remember before your marriage) specially if they are in puberty ages and even if not doing such actions in front of them might advance and hasten their puberty. Also your brothers are non-mahram to your wife and there is no difference between them and a stranger in this rule and your relationship with your wife must be proper in front of non-mahram so the same way you don’t joke with your wife in street because of non-mahram, the same rule applies at home as well.

Our suggestion is to keep it in in a privet area like your own room, hotel room etc. and in front of others act normal.

However, this does not at all mean that you cannot sit beside her and express your care for her by doing so. But you may want to draw some lines on other things.


Sheikh Mahdi Mosayyebi