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Is it my Islamic right to get divorce and remarry?


I have been married for 17 years. My husband was deported for criminal record after 7 years of my marriage. I have 3 kids. My husband can’t afford us I
So I have been sending money back home. I can’t go since I have a job and only income to support my kids and him. We are not together for 10 years now. We are both living separate. I have seen him only 2 times in all these years. Is it my Islamic right to get divorce and remarry? My husband didn’t marry And hoping to be together one day. We both don’t have any future hope. He loves his family but I can’t handle it anymore. What can I do in this situation? Can I get separation and remarry?


Salamun Alaykum

Thank you for your query.


You have the option to get a divorce. Your husband can divorce you or you can take Khul’ from him. The decision is yours, if you do not want to stay anymore with him as you mentioned you haven’t lived with him and have met only twice in all these year. Either you can migrate and live with him if you want to continue your life, or you can get the divorce and separate as you said neither you can meet nor he can support you.

You have mentioned that your husband loves his family but you can’t handle. If you mean you can’t handle that he loves his family then that is something which can be ignored and you can move on with it, but if you mean you can’t handle working and sending money while staying alone with your kids and without your husband then in this case there can be mutual understanding between you and your husband and accordingly you can divorce if you both come to a decision where you think living together isn’t possible at all, or you both do not want to stay together anymore.


If you feel your husband has changed and isn’t involved in the criminal things anymore and has repented, and if possible, you can stay with him, you may have a prosperous life.

You can keep all options and decide the best one accordingly.


Below are the rulings according to Ayatullah al-Udhma Sayyid Ali Sistany:

Ruling 2546. The divorce of a wife who is not fond of her husband and has an aversion to him and gives him her dowry (mahr) or some of her other property so that he divorces her is known as a ‘khul’ divorce. In a khul’ divorce, it is a requirement that the wife’s aversion to her husband be at such a level that it is a threat to her fulfilling her marital duties.

Question: A civil divorce, according to the law of a western country, took place. The husband is adamant not to grant his wife a shari’i divorce, does not provide maintenance for her and not accept mediation. What should the woman do, noting that her patience would certainly wear thin and, eventually, put her in an untenable situation (Haraj)?

Answer: She should seek redress with the Marji’ or his deputy. He would advise the husband to choose one of two courses of action: Either pay his wife maintenance money or grant her Islamic divorce, albeit by proxy. Should he choose neither, and that it was not possible to pay maintenance money, the Marji’ or his deputy should carry out the divorce.

Regarding husband and wife living together we find:

Ruling 2436. A husband cannot refrain from having sexual intercourse with a young wife of his for more than four months unless sexual intercourse is harmful or excessively difficult (mashaqqah) for him, or the wife consents to it, or he had stipulated a condition in the marriage contract regarding this. There is no difference in this rule (Hukm), based on obligatory precaution, whether the husband is in his home town or not. Therefore, based on obligatory precaution, it is not permitted for a husband to continue on a non-essential trip for more than four months without a legitimate excuse and without the permission of his wife.


Syed Haider