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I do not want my Iman to leave me

Q:

Assalaamalaikum,
I’m writing to you, to ask you a really crucial query. I am pretty jobless these days and I also know that an empty mind is a Devils workshop. That, with an Internet connection, is a recipe for disaster. I have been watching a lot of YouTube videos and testimony of ex Muslims and apostates. I come from a moderately religious family and have spent most of my life studying Islam as a part of my upbringing and I am happy I am able to get some understanding of it. I hate to admit it but these testimonials although don’t deter my confidence in God Almighty, have seemingly made me lazy in my faith and practice. I wasn’t a very punctual salat offerer but I did acknowledge the importance of it and the severity of neglecting once salah. but now it feels different. It feels different because I feel like meh.. Its okay, doesn’t matter. I do not feel remorseful. I would like to say about the apostates – to each their own- I respect their opinion which I find is many times mixed with culture and desire for a perfect ideal world, which doesn’t exist. I have submitted myself to my faith but now, I am struggling with awakening my connection with God. I just feel very empty. I know I shouldn’t be watching these videos and I try to refrain from them, but they just play on, and the curiosity of why people would leave Islam makes me watch it. I really do not agree with any of their views but it is making me very lazy in my faith. Which has started to worry me. I request your guidance and support on this matter, I do not want my iman to leave me. I have benefited a lot from my belief time and again in my life and I would really not be happy about a bunch of strangers influencing my mind. I do have a tendency to get easily influenced. Please help me. Thanks. Salaam

A:

Wa Alaikum al-salam

Thanks for your question,

It is very good that you worry about you faith.

First,  you must stop watching these videos, because for you in your current state of belief these are considered as misguiding, since you get easily influenced by these videos, watching them for you is Haram considering the effect on you, if you continue watching you might lose your belief completely.

Second, try to strengthen your belief by reading or watching argumentative videos about religion so your faith become with reason and you know the responses and answers to these apostates

May Allah swt guide all of us to the best

regards

Sheikh Mahdi Mosayyebi