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I cannot forget the girl I wanted to marry? What should I do?

Q:

I am 20 years old and love a girl and wanted to marry her. My parents wanted me to marry my first cousin as I didn’t want to I talked about my choice with my mother she completely disagreed and said that we have respect and what would the relatives say and stuff like that I tried hard. I even told everything to my cousin whom my parents wanted me to marry. The girl I loved waited for me and for my parents to agree as her parents were forcing her to get married and now she is married and is in Nikah with someone else I still love her and have the same wish to get married to her at this stage should I pray to ALLAH to that I  want to marry her is this right or wrong. The reason is I can’t live without her and can’t even forget her and I cannot give the required love to the girl my parents want me to marry. What should I do in this regard ? Please help me.

A:

Al-Salam Alaykum
Thank you for your question.

Humans are capable of great things. If they say they cannot do something it means they do not have enough motivation to do it. So, I suggest you strengthen your motive for it.

You must remind yourself that looking for something that is lost and is not in your hands will lead to missing out on other opportunities in front of you. There are many better cases for you and hurting yourself by reminding you of that girl is not helpful but destructive.

Also remember Amir Al-Mumenin said everything from this world is bigger in your mind and when you reach it, it is not as good as you imagined it to be. It is possible that even if you marry that girl you would face problems. Ask Allah for a better wife and Allah is capable of giving you a better one. Tell Allah I left that girl for my parents and I ask you for a better wife.

Best regards
Sayyid Madani