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husbands obligation towards his deceased brother’s family.


My brother in law passed away 7 years ago leaving behind a widow and 3 children (2 daughters and a son) My husband has been financially supporting them since then and we intend to do so inshallah in future as well. I have always supported my husband in this cause and never questioned anything.

The issue is that I’ve noticed over time that the wife of my deceased brother in law tries to extract excessive money and material stuff from my husband apart from her monthly amount that has been set by my husband ( very modest amount fees and food is paid separately apart from the monthly amount)
I as the wife am not comfortable abt her approaching my husband directly for her requirements and I’ve told her twice as a sister to speak to me if she needs anything and I will take it forward with my husband. But she for some reason doesn’t want to bring me into the equation when it comes to her family and my husband. And she is now using her children to get her material requirements fulfilled by asking them to approach my husband directly. Her children are very demanding and she never gives in to them.
I have a daughter of my own she is 18 and we have raised her in a way where she does not demand anything from us except basic stuff.
I want to know if I’m right in thinking that it’s my place and my place alone to demand anything out of my husband and not hers. it bothers me as im not a demanding wife and we live very modestly and I cant see her using her children as a means of using my husband.


Assalamun Alaykum.

Thank you very much for your Question,

so, the rights that you have over your husband as a wife is way more than any other woman can have. In your sister in laws case, being  your husband’s sister in law, she is related to your husband and probably finds it comfortable to speak to him directly. It is important you understand that it maybe difficult for her to address her issues with you.
however, if you aren’t very comfortable, you can speak to your husband about this and see what he has to say about it and how he can help. as for their demands, it is important to meet to their legitimate needs and wants, not all demands should be met to, more so because you are also indirectly training the children. if possible you can teach them the way you taught your Daughter.

May Allah increase your sustenance as you’re looking after three orphans.