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How do I respond to this situation? What is expected of me?

Q:

I’m dealing with a difficult situation where my cousin is being ill treated and oppressed in terms of religious freedom. She is being threatened if she ever wears hijab for example. She told me this in secret that she experiences this and when I told her that I wanted to speak against the oppressor she asked me several times not to do that, she said don’t say anything directly about my situation to her, fearing what the oppressor might say or do if she finds out she told me in secret about this. I felt bad and said that I would do it if it’s against her will, thinking that as the oppressed she at least has the right to refuse help. She told me that I could speak about it indirectly like mentioning importance of hijab and the evils of prohibiting that which Allah made obligatory and vice versa, which I did to the best of my ability but I don’t think it changes anything. Now I’ve been suffering from severe anxiety and severe depression because I fear that I’m sinning by not speaking against this directly and clearly, while knowing that it is happening, I fear to die in this state and that I will be punished. But at the same time I kind of gave my word/trust to her that if she doesn’t want me to say anything that I wouldn’t do it. This subject has occupied my mind to such a great extent that I even suffered from it physically for some time. I am constantly distracted and unfocused it even affects me in terms of my worship. I just need knowledge about how to deal with this situation I hope then my severe anxiety will go away. I am also confused as to how to behave with the oppressor it is a very close family member, I can’t shun her because of my extreme weak position, I live under my parents still and I suffer from abuse because of my obvious (Islamic) way of live anyways, I fear it will make things unbearably difficult for me if I do that, it will create scandals etc. How do I respond to this situation? What is expected of me? Please respond as soon as possible . May Allah reward whoever relieves me from this distress

A:

Al-Salam Alaykum

In such situation we suggest to empower the oppressed one so he/she can stand for her/him self. It is not possible for you or any other to stand for others; Everybody must fight their own battels!

talk to her. Show her ways she can stand for herself. try to reduce the consequences of standing up. find alternatives for the work.

Best regards!
Sayyid Madani