The World Federation One Stop Fiqh
Search
Menu

Ask an Alim

How can I find Allah in my life?

Q:

Assalamulalaikum…… i want to ask how can i find Allah in my life? i have lost my connection with him .. i am a muslim and belong to a very strict religious family but for the past 3 years i am in a long distance realtionship with a guy whom i love more than anything else in the world i know its forbidden in islam to talk to a boy before marriage but i dont want to leave him i just can’t live without him but the problem is in these 3 years i have lost myself somewhere whenever i try to make a dua i feel like i m too bad to ask for forgiveness from Allah .. Allah doesn’t like me he doesn’t want me to pray because he might be angry with him as i am not leaving that guy …… i cannot even share these feelings to anyone in my home because they ain’t gonna understand me i sometimes i ask to Allah why he has sent that guy into my life i never wanted him but now i am too much attached to him that i cannot imagine my life without my love …..is there any way that i continue to talk to that guy and at the same time i can have Allah in my life ? i need Allah i need him to solve my problems i need him to get me far apart from all these worldly things

A:

Salaamun alaykum sister,

We are all human beings and have a tendency to make mistakes and stray away at times but the most important thing is to realise our mistakes, repent and try to never repeat them, which in your case, you have realised your mistake which is the first step to getting close to Allah (swt). Allah is ever ready to embrace us, it is because of our own ‘persistance’ in committing sins do we lose our connection with Him. So we should never despair of Allah’s mercy because this one of the greatest sins. If we have realised our mistake, we should repent and try and correct our mistakes. Allah loves those who sincerely turn back to Him. He is the Most Merciful, 70 times more merciful than our parents. How can someone like Him reject His own servants who return towards Him.

Another thing to keep in mind is if we dearly and really love Allah (swt), then we have to show it through our actions by submitting to Him totally for His laws are for our own good. He loves us and wants the best for us.
So if you really love this man and you know he is a good man, then you should ask him to propose to you so you can get married and make your relationship halaal. And if he really loves you and is not only passing his time with you, then I am sure he will not have a problem with that. And I am sure you can find away to talk to your parents respectfully and calmly and i am sure they would understand.
And you mentioned in your email as to why Allah (swt) sent this man in your life, I would like to say that He has granted us intellect and has given us the quran and the Ahlul Bayt to guide us through, in our lives. And above all this, he has granted us freewill by which we are free to choose either the right path or the wrong. We have been granted freewill so we can be tested

إِنَّا هَدَيْنَاهُ السَّبِيلَ إِمَّا شَاكِرًا وَإِمَّا كَفُورًا
Indeed We have guided him to the way, be he grateful or ungrateful.(sura insaan:3)
So when things come our way in life, we have to think carefully and choose the right path.
May Allah(swt) always give us the tawfiq to choose the right path in life so we can attain His pleasure in this world and the herafter.

Regards
Zahra Davdani