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How can I bring my husband to the true path of Islam.


I hope my message finds you well. I am in a dillemma that I cannot share with my family but this particular thing has been bothering me and I thought speaking to a scholar can help. I am a practising Muslim who has been married for two years. My husband treats me well and I try to fulfil my responsibility towards him. We have been a happy couple until I found out that he has been having sexual chats with an older woman in my area and was planning on meeting her. I spoke to him about it, and he apologized and promised not to do it again. I should tell you I am not a doubting wife. I came across these texts while playing on his phone. Ever since I found those sexual texts, he has been trying to make up to me until I found he was flirting with another woman and was deleting those texts straightway. I do not know if Allah is giving me any sign but in the brief moment between him deleting these texts it caught my eyes even when I was not searching his phone or anything. I spoke to him calmly and reminded him of what Islam says about his responsibility towards his wife. Though he apologized again he still does not understand why I was so hurt with texts that did not mean anything. According to him, it was harmless fun since he was not planning on meeting them. I should tell you that he had similar chats with women before our marriage. Though after these incidents I  am acting calm and continuing with my daily chores, I am deeply hurt and cannot focus on my study. I know Allah does not like divorces but I do not know what I should do now, or how can I bring him on the true path of Islam so that he becomes a responsible husband or should I leave him since I cannot shake it off my mind and feel betrayed?


Wa alaykum Salam

Thank you for your question.
I sympathise with you and I understand that you are emotionally hurt as it’s not easy for a woman to tolerate her husband’s involvement with other women.

From what I have understood from your question is :
[  ]  Until now your husband’s relationship with other women has only been through chatting and he hasn’t met them physically. Although this itself is a sin and can be an initiative for further involvement.

[  ] This has become a habit for him and it seems that he is addicted to it.[  ] He fulfils his duty towards you and treats you well.
[  ] He doesn’t want to hurt you and tries his best to make it up for you.

These facts can help you deal with the emotional trauma you are going through.

I know it is not easy for you to tolerate all this but you should know that your husband’s behaviour is not because he is interested in some else or that he doesn’t love you. It is because he has developed a bad habit which needs to be fixed.
And you are the best person who can help him. Try and find out the reason behind this habit. What is it that he is looking for from women other than his wife? Also, both of you need to visit a counsellor or a psychologist who can be of great help in this situation.
One more thing you mentioned in your question is that you want to help your husband become a better Muslim. InshaAllah, if you help him get rid of this bad habit, gradually he will come back to the right path. Also don’t forget to do dua, Allah is the best helper.

Best wishes,
Sukaina Taqavi