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Forgiveness for Lying Several Times

Q:

Actually i had a girlfriend.but after breakup i found a letter of another boy written” the days spent with you were lovely,please meet me once”.reading these words i became sure that she was cheating me.she was happy after breakup.so i decided to write a letter to her mentioning that i know everything she did to me an also mentioning that dont be in a wrong intention that u succeeded in cheating me.In the letter i mentioned that i saw u with a boy near your college and after reading the letter from your bag i became sure that you was cheating me.
The problem here is whatever i wrote about the letter was true but about the boy that i saw her with was false statement.i did not see her with any boy.i just told like this just to make her believe that i knew you was cheating me with that guy simultaneouly.otherwise she might have told me that the other boy was his boyfriend after mine and her beeakup.later she herself involved her family in it and i told to her family that i saw her with that boy.and i told this in front of her.But after all these mess i asked her for forgiveness saying that i said so much things in front of everyone.i also mentioned that the boy i saw you with might be an illusion and i might have seen someone else.here also let me mention that i didnt see anyone else.i just told her like this to ask forgiveness.i also mentioned that the letter might also be an illusion which was not because i saw that letter and read it myself but for forgivess i told her like this.she forgave me.again we got together. I wanted to marry her but again after some days something happened and we broke up. This time i knew we are never gonna be together again so i asked for forgiveness for everything that please forgive me for anything and everything i have done to you.this time again she forgave me for everything.i knew i might have done so much thing that might have hurt her.but while aaking for forgiveness i did not remember everything i had done to her.so i just told her forgive me for anything and everything.so the ques here is lied to her and her family in feont of everyone that i
saw her with that boy.At that time also i had asked for forgivness lying that as an illusion that that could be someone else.later again i asked her for forgiveness for anything and everything i had done to her.she forgave me both the times.
So do i need to ask her for forgivness again mentioning what i lied that time or is it forgiven in when she forgave me for anything and everything.she is not in contact with me now.she has changed her moblie number.it is very difficult for to mention that and again ask for forgiveness.i know this is a kabeera sin and perhaps allah will forgive me if she forgives me.so when i asked for forgiveness for anything and everything,is my lie also forgiven by her in it?

A:

bismillah

Salaamun Alaikum

Lying is indeed a sin and we should seek forgiveness from Him. Lying is not counted among the ‘rights of others’, and therefore, you don’t need to ask for her forgiveness if you lied to her. As long a you regret your actions and you repent to Allah (swt) seeking His forgiveness, it is sufficient and inshAllah you will be forgiven.

I must however bring to your attention that having a relationship outside marriage is a great sin, and from your email, it seems as though you have ignored this point. Any relationship or physical contact with a girl that you haven’t Islamically married is haram and a great sin, and one should therefore stay away from having girlfriends, and sincerely repent from their previous actions.

I pray for your guidance and tawfiq.

Miqdad R.