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Fear Over sharing My personal Affairs with Father’s


Hello. I have a father who I believe is putting the evil eye on me. He has shown many signs of being threatened by me and has tried shutting me up or dismissing me/belittling me many times whenever I spoke about anything that made me come off as ‘smart’. I know the importance of keeping my personal affairs to myself in order to keep evil eye away, but he is consulting with someone about my life and my future for purposes of Ruqyah. I also know that ‘telling’ the future is haram. This supposed Ruqyah specialist says that there is a nasty jinn after me, who wishes to spoil my life. My issue with this is that I don’t trust me father at all. He has abused me mentally, emotionally, verbally, and in other insidious ways I don’t wish to get into. He confessed to me years ago that he used to consult with jinns for answers and that he went to people and told them to tell him of my life, personality, future, etc. How can me keeping quiet about my affairs be useful if this person is consulting people who use methods of extracting information about me anyways? And how can I block my information from going to this type of person? Also, I know he’s my father and I’m obligated to keep in contact him, despite all of the evil things he has done to me. What I have no intentions of doing, however, is remaining around him or putting myself at risk for his toxicity. What is the ruling of this so-called “parent’s right” if they have done any type of sihr on you? If sihr is so evil and such an abomination, does this change anything despite him being my father, if he has done anything?

Salaam Alaykum,
Thank you for your question. The main obligations are to financially provide for them if they are in need, to speak to them politely and to not treat them in a way that would be considered as not being good to them. That does not necessarily mean living near them. Below is an excerpt from Ayatullah Sistani’s Code of Practice for Muslims in the West which I hope answers your question more fully.
Question: What are the limits of obeying one’s parents?Answer: The duty of a child towards his parents is of two kinds:The First: To be kind towards them by providing for them, if they are in need. To provide for their day-to-day needs. To respond to their requests that are related to their daily lives at a level that is normal and usual for a human being, in the sense that if he refuses to fulfill them, it would be regarded as “not being good to them” — and that would differ depending on whether they are healthy and strong or ill and weak.The Second: To behave towards them kindly, by not offending them in word or action, even if they are unjust to him. In some religious text, it says, “And if they hit you, do not shun them; instead say, ‘May Allãh forgive you.’”This is as far as it relates to the parents’ situation. As for those issues concerning the affairs of the child himself by which he could offend one of the parents, these are of two kinds:The First: If the parent’s distress results from his concern for the child, it is forbidden for the child to do something that would distress his parent, irrespective of whether or not the parent has prevented him from it.The Second: If the parent’s distress results from of his own evil characteristics (for example, dislike for the good of this world or the hereafter for his child), this kind of distress has no bearing on the child, thus, it is not obligatory on the child to submit to this kind of desires.It becomes clear from this that, on its own, obeying the parents in their personal commands is not obligatory. And Allãh knows the best.
May you always be successful.