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Unwanted attractions

Q:

Salaam alaikum,

If a Muslim youth finds himself experiencing unwanted attractions to the same gender, yet he still seeks to live a halal life and not indulge in a sinful lifestyle what advice can you give to lessen these attractions?

People today say “you can’t change what you are attracted to”, but surely this is a situation that followers of the Ahlulbayt (as) must have dealt with in the past?

Any specific dua, or changes in habits, or areas of personal development that you can suggest – any advice from Allah SWT and the Ahlulbayt (as) on this issue?

A:

Alaykum salaam

Thank you for your question. The position of Islam on same gender attraction is well known. It is that there is nothing natural about the attraction and it is absolutely forbidden to take any action on that attraction. There is no Islamic life with homosexuality. That being the case also gives light on how someone that feels they are experiencing these attractions can decrease them and hopefully get rid of them.

You see not all thoughts that pass through a persons mind have reality behind them. Sometimes it is the whispering of Satan and other times it is the lower self. Both of these voices are to be combated and the best cure for them is to ignore them. In the modern world same gender attraction is validated as something normal for a certain number of people. However Islam does not validate these seeming attractions for anyone and so to combat them you must first firmly take the Islamic position of their absolute invalidity and then proceed to fight them through ignoring them.
It may take time depending on how long you have been going through this but eventually they will decrease and finally go. The attraction is like any bad habit. It can be controlled until the urge no longer exists.

May Allah grant you success
‘Abd Allah Esmail