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My question is why Allah almighty made me a coward ?

Q:

Asalaam u aleikum sheikh,
My name is Shahid. I am a 30 year old guy .
My question is why Allah almighty made me a coward ?
Whenever In my life I was challenged for a fight, I came out to be a coward. Now if I was a person who is psychically weak I might have convinced myself that it’s not cowardice that stops me to fight back rather the decision to not fight was a smart decision.

Even if there comes a moment when a kid bullies me and pushes me to a fight, my hands and feets become jam and if someone abuse me or scold me and when I try to even answer back my mouth freezes and my whole face freezes and when I force myself to speak, I speak like someone who has problem of stammering.
I have been mocked all my life from the days of my school to this day where I am a fully grown man .
Perhaps You won’t understand how psychologically damaging it is. What kind of mercy is this from Allah?
I think I am a very humble and polite guy that thinks ten times before I speak to make sure my words doesn’t hurt anyone. Or perhaps my cowardice has made me humble. I prayed to Allah even tahajud but I think it’s in my decree to get disgraced.
I know you will tell me that there is wisdom and this and that, but wallahi I am being humiliated like a dog by him. I am not a bad person either.
I am also thinking to not marry, because I don’t think I can protect a woman.

A:

Salam Alikum

All of us have different personality, weakness and strength by birth and we learn many of them through our lives. having a weakness does not mean we must carry it with us until death and we can improve ourselves with practices. if you think you have a problem of feeling like a coward, it is a challenge for you to work on; not to be crippled by it and say Allah (az) gave it to me. so i don’t say it is wisdom, i say it is a challenge and you must be brave and face it😉
personal improvement is a must for everybody and we must follow it until our last moment.
Here are some practices that help you to be brave:
1- never use phrases like “why Allah almighty made me a coward ?”. There are two problems with this sentence. A. you put the responsibility for not being courageous on Allah. B. calling yourself with negative. For being courageous the first step is to accept the responsibilities and facing the consequences. when you hold others responsible, you think it is out of your hand and instead of working on it just nag in your privat time.

2.try new things with minimum consequences. new food, new clothes with new color, small trips to new places. And do a bravery act which would not attract negative attention or negative reaction from someone.

3. try less scary things like talk in public. things that scars you but not so much. if you can start teaching something.

4.think like what is called the worst case scenario. Many of your fears do not have serious consequences, vice versa if they go as planned it can make a pleasant memory and in the worst case scenario leave you with happy and funny memories. but be prepared for example if others laugh at you laugh with them, this makes a connection between you and your audience.

5. find a friend which force you to such situations. if you can find someone who can trust and he can check you constantly you will progress so fast Inshallah.

6. get help from a specialist! it is not a bad thing. lots of us need to learn from others. Some of them are tricks for betterment of our personal behavior.
be brave! fake it until you make it!

7. Certainly marry. No one is perfect. She will come with her faults but together you will complete each other is

best regards!
AAA team
Under the guidance of Sayyid Madani