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Cousin issue



I dont want my husband to be free with one of his cousins we both are aware of the reasons. But he isnt listening to me and says that you i am doing sil a reham. It is creating issues between us, her actions and antics towards men arent right that is what bothers me the most. May i in the wrong?


Salaamun alaykum

Thank you for your email.

Silat al-rahim is formed of the two words of “sila” and “rahim.” The word “sila” is derived from the root of “w-s-l” meaning “to join two things” and “rahim” which means “womb.” The word “rahim” in “silat al-rahim” refers to blood relation.

Commonly people consider two kinds of relationships:

  • Blood relationship which is made by blood and through the womb such as a father, mother, children, brother, sister, uncle, aunt, grandfather and grandmother and the children of those who are called blood relatives (arham). Silat al-rahim is obligatory with this group and if a gift is given to any of them, it is not permissible to take it back.
  • In-law relationship which is made through marriage, such as the relationships made between couples and their relatives. There are different opinions on whether obligatory silat al-rahim also includes this group or not.


This does not mean we have to stop having relations with our relatives who are namahram. Islam has told us to have good relations and good Akhlaq with everyone. We just have to be careful not to cross our limits and stay within the boundaries that Islam has prescribed.

However, if the relation brings about issues and doubts, then sile Rahim can be done indirectly as well. Like  via phone, message or even third party.

best would be to speak to your husband  and see what best suits your family.


Kind regards,

AAA team under the guidance of Z.Z.D