The World Federation One Stop Fiqh
Search
Menu

Ask an Alim

Interfaith Marriage

Q:

Assalamu alaikum I have done so much research asked many imam online and seen many videos And concluded it is allowed to marry the christian girl who loves me so badly so strong and wants to convert to islam as she believes jesus is not god She never had worshiped cross or had any photos of jesus or mary ever She is ready to accept islam so strong, grow the childrens in islamic ways be a strong muslim with humanity But when i informed my parents about it though my mom didnt felt good at first some how managed to accept it and they say like how can we go to a christin family have relationship with them as in-laws etc.. but my dad is so stubborn she cannot accept a nonmuslim girl tho she is from people of books even after i explained them about the Surah 5 that christians cannot be treated like disbelivers and especially 5:5 They are not convinced they dont want to listen anything their mayjor problems are 1. That i choose a girl my self instead of choosing a girl from their selections 2. they cannot accept a christian or non-muslim since others will talk ill complain blame etc which makes them difficult to face people and also to have a relationship with christian in-laws But right now the condition is serious her dad aged 68 has serious diabetic lost a sight and recently admitted in hospital because of very low pulse but with allah grace he is now ok but the kidney is now getting affected her mom and dad is believing so much on me and also wants me to marry her daughter as thats what makes her happy there by making them happy even in this health condition they are not forcing her to leave me considering the happiness of her daughter So my questions are like: 1.My parents wants me to leave her and her family even if it takes their lives away. So by that way I respect my parents and so allah will give me a better life for respecting my parents also will not give me any sin of causing any harm to that girl family. 2.If i stick to her then immediately i have to leave the family taking my clothes alone (My dad’s order) 3.I want both of them.There are hadees like not to force a girl for marriage but can a boy be forced. Dnt i have the right to choose myself a girl as it is my life when girls have the right to fight if they dnt like the guy .I havent done anything else that my parents dislike but isnt this my personal can i expect it my way. 4. I have done thaujud, isthikara, fasting, etc.. but still i couldnt choose any1 side If i choose my family i have to loose my heart and later marry another girl without intrest and like i fool her also surely hearing that i left this girl who waited for me so long sacrificed eveyhthing her dad will die because of his health condition and there by her entire family will be affected and i get all the sins. If i choose her my entire family will stay away from me and i cant see my mom worrying struggling What should i do please help

A:

Salamun Alaykum

This is indeed a difficulty situation to be in.

In the end you cannot be forced whom to marry but the happiness of your parents is very important in God’s eyes I suggest that if the girl first becomes Muslim, begin to pray and wear the Hijab and visit the mosque, etc., then your parents may be more inclined to accept her.

I have prayed for your success.

With kind regards

Abbas Jaffer