The World Federation One Stop Fiqh

Ask an Alim

Breaking relations with In Laws



I want to ask a simple question regarding the relation ship with my In Laws. Actually in 4 years they tried all means to break my Nikah or marriage, they try it by abusing my family, insulting me, beating my wife to forget me and so on. Even in last they make me forcefully make a simple marriage that I alone just bring her instead of a proper marriage where my family and friends could go.

Even now they are trying to break our marriage but we are not talking with them. My question is this if I don’t want to communicate with them is it ok? Is it Qata El Taluq like breaking of relationships.

I am newly wed and I don’t want my life to get spoiled. My wife is 100% with me because she knew what happened to her and with me in 4 years. Now with her consent can we skip talking with her family for at least 3 or 4 years so that we can develop our basis life and not getting interrupted


As-salamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullah

thanks for your question

according to Islam everybody has some responsibilities toward their family, specially their parents; with marriage you get a new family which according to Quran and hadith you are not allowed to disconnect, according to prophet sawa breaking ties with family has sever and quick punishment in this world. So you cannot cut off your relationship with them at least  your wife can not, because she has some wajib duties toward her parent, besides since they are her family she has feelings for them and breaking ties with them will cause tension and stress or other problems for her and consequently for you as well.

so a complete cut off relationship is not a good idea (for many reasons like reconnecting with will be very hard, they might blame you for it, or that could affect your wife’s emotional life) but you can manage or change the style of your communications, so you don’t get hurt by them. try these steps inshaAllah things will get better:

  1.  talk to your wife about your feelings and be in the same page together (so she understands that you are not accusing anyone)
  2. Be yourself and lower your expectations
  3. Clarify boundaries for your marriage life
  4. Try to manage your communications with them, a distance that doesn’t hurt you ( getting very close to them) nor complete cut off.



Sheikh Mahdi Mosayyebi