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Being a son is it permissible for me to ask my father about the relationship with their family? Or should I stop doubting on him.

Q:

Assalamalaikum,
My father goes to a house of non muslim widow woman for tuition to her son aged about 14 years. As the family of the widow woman is needy my father teaches him for free of cost, my father helps them with money, cloths, etc and goes to their house daily. I have doubt with the relationship of my father and the widow woman, may be extra marital affair but I am not sure. My father offers daily 5 times salah. Being a son is it permissible for me to ask my father about the relationship with their family? Or should I stop doubting on him. If my father’s intention is pure then Whether Islam allows my father to take care of a non muslim needy family ? Please answer me with reference of Quran and hadith.Jazak Allahu Khairan.

A:

Wa alaykum salaam

– General principle of doing good to a Muslim or a non Muslim according to the Quran.

Al-Mumtahanah 60:8

لَّا يَنْهَىٰكُمُ ٱللَّهُ عَنِ ٱلَّذِينَ لَمْ يُقَٰتِلُوكُمْ فِى ٱلدِّينِ وَلَمْ يُخْرِجُوكُم مِّن دِيَٰرِكُمْ أَن تَبَرُّوهُمْ وَتُقْسِطُوٓا۟ إِلَيْهِمْۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يُحِبُّ ٱلْمُقْسِطِينَ

Allah does not forbid you as regards those who did not fight you on account of faith, and did not expel you from your homes, that you do good to them, and deal justly with them. Surely Allah loves those who maintain justice.

another verse which is unconditional when it discusses about doing good to each other i.e it also involves the non muslims

Al-Ma’idah 5:2

يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ لَا تُحِلُّوا۟ شَعَٰٓئِرَ ٱللَّهِ وَلَا ٱلشَّهْرَ ٱلْحَرَامَ وَلَا ٱلْهَدْىَ وَلَا ٱلْقَلَٰٓئِدَ وَلَآ ءَآمِّينَ ٱلْبَيْتَ ٱلْحَرَامَ يَبْتَغُونَ فَضْلًا مِّن رَّبِّهِمْ وَرِضْوَٰنًاۚ وَإِذَا حَلَلْتُمْ فَٱصْطَادُوا۟ۚ وَلَا يَجْرِمَنَّكُمْ شَنَـَٔانُ قَوْمٍ أَن صَدُّوكُمْ عَنِ ٱلْمَسْجِدِ ٱلْحَرَامِ أَن تَعْتَدُواۘ وَتَعَاوَنُوا۟ عَلَى ٱلْبِرِّ وَٱلتَّقْوَىٰۖ وَلَا تَعَاوَنُوا۟ عَلَى ٱلْإِثْمِ وَٱلْعُدْوَٰنِۚ وَٱتَّقُوا۟ ٱللَّهَۖ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ شَدِيدُ ٱلْعِقَابِ

O you who believe, do not violate (the sanctity) of the Marks of Allah, nor of the sacred month, nor of the sacrificial animal, nor of the garlands, nor of those proceeding to the Sacred House, seeking the grace of their Lord and (His) Pleasure. When you are out of IHrām, you may hunt. Malice against a people for their having prevented you from Al-Masjid-ul-Harām, should not cause you to cross the limits. Help each other in righteousness and piety, and do not help each other in sin and aggression. Fear Allah. Surely, Allah is severe in punishment.

– Allah instructs prophet Musa and Haroon to be good to Firawn who was the enemy of God. Thus the instruction is to be good even with enemy of God as long as they dont do dhulm on us.

Ta Ha 20:44

فَقُولَا لَهُۥ قَوْلًا لَّيِّنًا لَّعَلَّهُۥ يَتَذَكَّرُ أَوْ يَخْشَىٰ

So speak to him in soft words. May be, he accepts the advice and fears.

– in regards to your father having an extra marital relationship, i would humbly advise you to consider the following verse where Allah has put a very strict condition when it comes to accusing someone of wrongdoing, that is because the respect and dignity of a human being is very sacred for Allah.
An-Nur 24:4

وَٱلَّذِينَ يَرْمُونَ ٱلْمُحْصَنَٰتِ ثُمَّ لَمْ يَأْتُوا۟ بِأَرْبَعَةِ شُهَدَآءَ فَٱجْلِدُوهُمْ ثَمَٰنِينَ جَلْدَةً وَلَا تَقْبَلُوا۟ لَهُمْ
Those who accuse the chaste women (of fornication), but they do not produce four witnesses, flog them with eighty stripes and do not accept their any evidence any more. They are the sinners,

Thus, if you are only doubtful, then would request you to remove those doubts as sometimes doubts/ conjectures can be a sin as explained in sura hujurat.

In the end, yes if you feel that you need to discuss with your father regarding his dealings with that particular family, please do so but you can start with general discussions and slowly get into particulars, but all this should be done with a lot of respect. And if he denies about any relationship, then do accept it from him until you dont have a concrete witness to prove otherwise.

Regards
Sukaina Taqawi.